Here, There, Everywhere

ConnectthetotsOne of the observations shared most often from readers is relief at finding a place where they can feel at home and understood, even celebrated. They had grown accustomed to being all but invisible amid the mommy-centric culture in which we now live. (I guess you could say we’re counter-culture.)

This week provided ample evidence that we’re actually very much here, there and everywhere:

  • I saw the film, Georgia O’Keeffe, last night and was reminded of the unique legacies associated with our special tribe of women. We are capable of expressing a different view of the world through the lens of our lives, our own experiences. Monica Wiesblott is one such woman. In Ventura, CA, you can visit Monica’s art exhibit through October 23. She’s a talented artist, with a gift for telling stories in poignant and power images. You can learn more about her work in this interview.
  • Christina Gombar wrote an honest and insightful column about the nature of friendships and the motherhood divide that ran in The Huffington Post, Psychology Today, and Dr. Irene Levine’s friendship blog . The piece and the comments that resulted shed light on a set of ideas not often heard today. (Nice work, Christina!)
  • In an odd twist of fate, The New York Times paired a media segment from June 2008 called Voices of Infertility with a story on the latest Nobel Prize winner for medicine, Dr. Robert Edwards. That the majority of women profiled didn’t succeed with the IVF treatment Dr. Edwards pioneered was truly ironic. When I saw my picture under the Nobel Prize winner’s shot I couldn’t help but feel like Forest Gump.
  • And in Finland — as I learned this morning — even with language barriers we still have a chance to understand each other from the heart. Simpukka, the Finnish Infertility Association, shares a story in its latest magazine that resonates beyond traditional borders. It examines a universal experience when we’re left to find a new path. Kudos to Natalia for tackling a very tough topic. (Thank you, too. I am honored to know you.)

Pamela Tsigdinos

Writer, blogger and, oh, yeah, infertility survivor. My memoir, Silent Sorority, tells the whole story. There's a movie in there somewhere. Given the quirkiness needed to relate it all I'm thinking Jennifer Lawrence would be a good fit.

  1. happynenes

    Now that I’m more open about my infertility, it seems like I meet people all the time who’ve been through a similar experience – it really is like a secret sorority. I met a friend of one of my friends who had twins through a surrogate after failed IVF and a surrogate pregnancy loss. I talked to her about being in the delivery room for the birth of those hard won babies and I felt so happy for her. One of our own who won the battle. I thought, way to go sister! Hugs to you all, ladies!

  2. Bea

    Love Christina’s piece about friendship. It doesn’t just go for parentspeak, of course – monopolising the conversation with any topic, such as work, a hobby, a pet, etc etc, is rude. I’ve heard it used as a first-date test – if the person sits there and talks about themselves through X number of questions/amount of time before asking you a single thing about yourself, don’t make a second date! Sometimes old friends forget to be polite to each other.

    Bea

  3. Kim

    Christina’s article is GREAT!! I think she stated straight and to the point what so many of us have wanted to say to our mom friends. Your children are wonderful, but enough already!

    I like talking to the kids more than the parents sometimes because they have outside interests.

    Pamela, God Bless on your recent honor by RESOLVE. Your strong and eloquent voice has done so much for this community. I smile when I see someone post that is new to this blog, because I remember how awesome and comforting it was when I first Googled something like”infertility support” and found it.

    Kim

  4. Pamela

    Thanks, Kim! And I agree very much with your assessment on Christina’s piece. She is a talented writer and a keen observer of the world in which we live.

    I also loved your comment about talking to kids due to their wider ranger of subject matter! Thanks, too, for continuing to make new visitors feel welcome, and for keeping the conversation going here…

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