Room for Dissent on IVF?

Room for Dissent on IVF?

Should IVF Coverage Be Mandatory? Writer Christina Gombar first posed this provocative question in 2009.  In a stand against RESOLVE’s stated goal to “control the conversation,” she agreed to let me repost her dissent perspective here. ~~ A couple of Decembers ago, I got an email from Resolve, the national infertility organization — a plea for end-of-year, tax-deductible donations. “Imagine a world where fertility treatment didn’t exist …”  began the missive. It had been years since I looked to Resolve for aid in my finally defunct effort to have a…

Conflict of Interest?

Conflict of Interest?

Most of us take non-profits and their causes at face value and assume the people leading the charge are straight arrows. This is not always the case.  The most recent example of things not quite being what they seem came from the recent CBS News investigation into the Wounded Warrior Project. Non-profits formed around diseases are also ending up in the hot seat. A few years back Susan G. Komen (formerly known as Susan G. Komen for the Cure and originally as The Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation) got…

Grief Is a Form of Love

Grief Is a Form of Love

It’s been a few years since I first began to pick up the pieces broken and splintered off in the tempest of infertility. Because there were no instructions for reassembly, no “how to cope with infertility” imparted by elders or learned through societal observation, I’ve had my fair share of trial and error. There were times when I tried to force a piece into place in a well-intended but bungled attempt to hurry the rebuilding process. For instance, feigning happiness at pregnancy and birth announcements before I’d fully come to terms…

Non-Moms and Moms Bridge the Infertility Gap

Non-Moms and Moms Bridge the Infertility Gap

Kudos to all who dropped by to read or participate in this week’s To Mom or Not to Mom open salon. I think we pushed each other out of our comfort zones and reached a new level of understanding … I know I did. The impetus for this idea? It stemmed from my awkwardness about Keiko embarking on a donor egg IVF cycle last month and what I should say (or not) as she worked her way through the difficult and uncertain process. We first met in NYC in September 2010 at the RESOLVE Night…

You’re The Author of Your Own Life

You’re The Author of Your Own Life

The life as a book metaphor isn’t new, but it does provide a novel way to infuse some creative license and fresh thinking into what can sometimes feel like stuff happening around and to you. I encourage those wrestling with what comes next to embrace the idea of becoming the author of your own life. At the same time you’re contemplating your own existence and character development, you can also observe more closely those around you and their life story construction. It’s never been easier to do what with all the online forums, blogs…

Thankful For Not So Silent Women

Thankful For Not So Silent Women

“I want to be totally okay with what is and surprised by how marvelous the future will be.” I read that quote on LaBelette Rouge‘s blog this morning and thought, That is so where I am today. Now, how the hell did I manage to get here? This comes after a walk down memory lane last night. I participated on a RESOLVE teleseminar (podcast soon to be available for download) about Surfing the Web for Fertility Information. As the “special guest blogger,” it was my job to address the ins…

Reader Mail Around the Globe: Discovery, Validation, Comfort

Reader Mail Around the Globe: Discovery, Validation, Comfort

I’m a bit jet lagged after flying across the United States. The travel part was easy. Now the challenge lies in what to say in my acceptance speech at the RESOLVE Night of Hope event on Tuesday evening. I’m allowed one minute and thirty seconds. That’s not much time to thank the international community of women who feel as close to me as sisters. You can be sure I’ll be thinking about each and everyone one of you as I nervously make my way to the podium. Meanwhile, I want…

Getting Ready for Prime Time

Getting Ready for Prime Time

A raw set of ideas preoccupied me as my oatmeal grew cold. I focused all my attention on the computer screen hoping the blinking cursor would magically lead me to the right metaphors or punchy soundbytes. I’ve been sleeping fitfully lately while my subconscious busily searches for a set of ideas that can be shaped and packaged for mainstream consumption. Most are discarded. They can’t be too abstract, too trite or too heavy.  And by all means, they can’t seem in any way preachy, snarky, bitter or shrill. The angle…

I Get Knocked Down, But I Get Up Again…

I Get Knocked Down, But I Get Up Again…

It was mid-afternoon in the Sierra Nevada Mountains when the email arrived. Three loads of laundry had been folded and tucked back into their rightful place. The kitchen floor glistened, still fresh from a serious mopping with Murphy’s Oil Soap. Digital images stored in my computer held joy and wonder from a long holiday weekend of Fourth of July fireworks, mini golf and lake fun. The junior croquet set bought for our nieces and nephews was stored in the garage. The marshmallows, carefully toasted over the Weber grill the night…