On Friendship and Hardship

On Friendship and Hardship

Strong, honest and profound friendships can be hard to come by in a fast-paced world characterized by constant interruptions, overscheduling and lives shared in 140 characters or less.  Sure, we can graze all day long but we often don’t feel fully satisfied. A hearty friendship feeds your soul. This weekend I feasted. Friday night the lights twinkled on the Bay Bridge in San Francisco as I drove down the Embarcadero. Beneath the warm light of the Ferry Building slow-walking tourists mixed with locals racing by in running gear. Just beyond the entry of a bustling restaurant…

What’s Your Litmus Test?

What’s Your Litmus Test?

The “why” didn’t fully dawn on me until I was in the final burst of last-minute packing for a Thanksgiving family visit. Our direct flight was just under an hour and half. The destination: a picturesque part of the country, home to the world’s largest international independent film festival, a former winter Olympic site, and some of most breathtaking national parks on the planet. Our relatives, peers in age and interests and genuinely warm and lovely people, had lived there since 1998. There was only one reason why it had taken us…

Happy T(w)ogether, Thank You Very Much

Happy T(w)ogether, Thank You Very Much

In the category of inflammatory headlines posed as a question here’s one from a self-described “journalist, mother, thinker” that begs a response: Are Childless Couples Headed Toward Divorce? The short answer from my field research is an emphatic: Hell No! The link to the provocative Huffington Post blog headline first came from a longtime pen pal who wrote me with this observation: “[this] absurd article rambles and makes no particular point. Is it saying that more non-childed couples divorce than childed couples do BECAUSE they are childless or because, if they realize things…

Thankful For Not So Silent Women

Thankful For Not So Silent Women

“I want to be totally okay with what is and surprised by how marvelous the future will be.” I read that quote on LaBelette Rouge‘s blog this morning and thought, That is so where I am today. Now, how the hell did I manage to get here? This comes after a walk down memory lane last night. I participated on a RESOLVE teleseminar (podcast soon to be available for download) about Surfing the Web for Fertility Information. As the “special guest blogger,” it was my job to address the ins…

Invisibility — Seen it Lately?

Invisibility — Seen it Lately?

“The minute you retire, it’s as if you’re invisible.” I had to do a double-take when I read that sentence in an article about how difficult it is to get Stanford profs to make space for younger faculty. What my brain read was “the minute you’re infertile, it’s as if you’re invisible.” Funny thing my brain, it loves a good Freudian slip. I felt a poignant kinship with the English Literature professor behind the quote. He was acknowledging what few of us in society truly want to admit — we…

Spring Break, Spring Cleaning and Springing Forward

Spring Break, Spring Cleaning and Springing Forward

Spring is almost here! What does that mean for you? Me? I’m counting the days until we leave for Ireland where the hills are always gloriously green. (Yes, there will be rain so I’ve picked up a new water-repellent, hooded jacket to keep me from getting soaked to the skin). Most of all I’m looking forward to some spring break time with my 10-year-old niece and 13-year-old nephew. They’re simply delightful and share many of my husband’s family characteristics. Among the fun is listening to their rich vocabulary. The Irish…