Outside The Bubble

Outside The Bubble

The world looks vastly different outside the bubble. Gone were the subliminal and overt messages about what a socially acceptable life is supposed to look like. Truthfully, once you you leave it behind, it can be a bit shocking to realize just how pervasive our social conditioning is. I was able to escape the noisy echo chamber that surrounds us during the longest getaway since graduating from university — 21 days visiting seven countries. With just minutes available online each day (mostly to scan email for anything urgent) I was…

Your Sanity Matters Much More Than You Think

Your Sanity Matters Much More Than You Think

This post is dedicated to new readers — those who found their way here from the Bitter Infertiles (podcast Episode 20). If you’re new to this blog, I hope you’ll see it’s quite pleasant here. Contrary to conventional wisdom, flowers grow. Laughter is encouraged. All in all, we strive to make this blog a place where women, mostly those who are not mothers through chance or circumstance, gather. We kibitz about the world as we as see it and how we can make it better. Sometimes we discuss movies, books,…

Not All Mothers Are Sanctimommies, Hooray!

Not All Mothers Are Sanctimommies, Hooray!

As part of my blogoversary week of lessons learned… #2 The Blogosphere Can Foster Strange Bedfellows One of the toughest aspects of being part of a group routinely held up for scrutiny (e.g. women without children) is facing detractors who feel perfectly at ease casting aspersions or passing value judgements on our lives. I don’t know about you, but I don’t particularly relish being put on the defensive. That’s why it was with some relief — and a smidge of amusement — that I found myself witness to, rather than…

What I Wish I’d Known Then: Virtual Casseroles Feed the Soul

What I Wish I’d Known Then: Virtual Casseroles Feed the Soul

February 3, 2007 marks a turning point. It’s the day I decided to reach outside my head, to wear my heart on my sleeve, and to seek some answers. Minutes after publishing my very first Coming2Terms blog post on that stormy night six years ago my stomach turned queasy. After years of suffering silently in the wake of infertility I decided it was time to venture out, to try to find women I could relate to and who, in turn, could relate to me. In surveying the nascent IF blogosphere…

Ending Fertility Treatment Equated with Madness?

Ending Fertility Treatment Equated with Madness?

Halloween may be over, but the chance to really scare the living daylights out of someone remains real 365 days a year. How you ask? Declare that you’re stepping away from the path to motherhood — and to really induce shrieks wave around a copy of Silent Sorority. That will seal the deal. Horrors! Of course, the scariness quotient depends on your vantage point. This morning over coffee I read a comment in response to last week’s open salon between a mom-to-be using donor eggs (Keiko) and moi, a woman…

Trading Places: My (M)other Life

Trading Places: My (M)other Life

It’s Day Two of the open salon hosted by yours truly and Keiko of The Infertility Voice. We created this dialogue to discuss both sides of the motherhood debate from our unique perspectives. Why? To parse out the concerns and vulnerabilities of transition within the ALI (adoption/loss/infertility) community without tripping over political correctness and delicate sensibilities. We hope you’ll join us every day this week and will be inspired to add your own responses in the comments here and at Keiko’s blog or by writing your own blog posts. Today is role play…

The Unintended Consequences of Placing ‘Moms’ on Pedestals

The Unintended Consequences of Placing ‘Moms’ on Pedestals

It’s Day Three of the open salon hosted by yours truly and Keiko of The Infertility Voice. We created this dialogue to discuss both sides of the motherhood debate from our unique perspectives. Why? To parse out the concerns and vulnerabilities of transition within the ALI (adoption/loss/infertility) community without tripping over political correctness and delicate sensibilities. We hope you’ll join us every day this week and will be inspired to add your own responses in the comments or by writing your own blog posts. Who doesn’t relish great role models?…

To Mom or Not to Mom

To Mom or Not to Mom

Welcome to an open salon hosted by yours truly and Keiko of The Infertility Voice. We created this dialogue to discuss both sides of the motherhood debate from our unique perspectives in a responsorial fashion. Over the next five days and culminating in an open Twitter discussion #ALIMomSalon this Friday, 10/26 at 12:30pm EDT, we seek to parse out the concerns and vulnerabilities of transition within the ALI (adoption/loss/infertility) community without tripping over political correctness and delicate sensibilities. We hope you’ll join us every day this week and will be inspired to…

Mom-in-Chief?

Mom-in-Chief?

M E M O R A N D U M TO: Michelle Obama RE: Mom-in-Chief? Was it Really Necessary to Try to Out-Mom Ann Romney? Full disclosure: I have been and remain a supporter of your husband, President Barack Obama, as well as a supporter of your tireless efforts to curb childhood obesity, your unwavering support of military families and your roll-with-it response when your hair styles and outfits get endlessly critiqued by anyone with a Twitter or blog account … However, in the interest of equal time (see Ann Romney MEMORANDUM), I must…

Enough With the Mom Pandering, Ann Romney

Enough With the Mom Pandering, Ann Romney

M E M O R A N D U M TO: Ann Romney RE: Enough Already With the Mom Pandering! Like many others I am a registered voter and a citizen who wants greatness not only to flourish in the United States of America, but in countries all over the world. I am also a political junkie who makes a point of listening to both parties and their respective cases for why they believe they are best equipped to lead. That’s right. Call me a glutton for punishment. Tonight I tuned into the Republican National Convention to listen to…