When Life is Interrupted By Failed Fertility

When Life is Interrupted By Failed Fertility

Missing from many of life’s conversations where infertility is concerned is the male perspective, which is why I was both pleased and surprised to see that the first questions asked during the Q&A portion of The Cycle: Living A Taboo Forum came from men. While I don’t remember the exact dialogue that unfolded, I do recall the powerful emotions conveyed as one man took the microphone and shared that he and his wife were approaching the end of their fertility treatments. Swallowing hard he recounted the toll treatments had taken…

One Small Step For Infertility Awareness, One Giant Leap For Society

One Small Step For Infertility Awareness, One Giant Leap For Society

My expectations for September 27 and The Cycle: Living A Taboo were very high — not only for those of us presenting at the forum, but for those who would join us. What transpired surpassed my expectations. As the evening drew near, we speakers assembled in Tribeca from Los Angeles, Silicon Valley, Spanish Harlem, Boston, and Manhattan. After we checked the mics, the camera crew took their positions, and the tall theater doors opened. In came those bringing genuine interest and (later) palpable support. The seats began to fill with…

Teach and Learn: Lift the Veil on a Taboo

Teach and Learn: Lift the Veil on a Taboo

UPDATE: Hat tip to Amy McVay Abbott, the journalist behind Infertility: The Billion Dollar Business & the Heartbreaking Realities and Jody Day for thought-provoking perspectives on our upcoming event The Cycle: Living A Taboo, and the importance of participating in the conversation. Jody wrote: “I get that it’s daunting to attend something where you’ll be filmed. But before you decide you can’t be part of this, not yet… ask yourself this: What have you done wrong? What do you have to be ashamed of? Nothing, that’s what. Nothing.” ~~~ Years…

The Wisdom of Experience and Value of Seeing the Whole Picture

The Wisdom of Experience and Value of Seeing the Whole Picture

Update: You can read the “The Grief of Infertility” #losschat transcript from the Twitter Chat earlier this week. The discussion is contained on Storify. Great sharing — we even had a man’s perspective. I’m not sure when I first started watching but every seven years I tune in for a viewing of a documentary series — the latest being 56 Up. It began in 1964 with a show looking at the lives of adorable seven-year-old British children. It’s unique in that every seven years since most all have appeared again…

Time Warp Tuesday: Advice

Time Warp Tuesday: Advice

When was the last time you took your own advice? And I mean put your very own recommendation into action. It’s usually much easier to hand out advice than it is to act on or internalize your own, isn’t it? Advice is the theme for this month’s Time Warp Tuesday blog hop/writing exercise. This monthly activity involves revisiting blog entries from the archives and reflecting on our journeys since we once sat down to write (or read) them. Thanks for the prompt Kathy and for sharing Lori’s father’s advice to “Draw a wider circle….

Outside The Bubble

Outside The Bubble

The world looks vastly different outside the bubble. Gone were the subliminal and overt messages about what a socially acceptable life is supposed to look like. Truthfully, once you you leave it behind, it can be a bit shocking to realize just how pervasive our social conditioning is. I was able to escape the noisy echo chamber that surrounds us during the longest getaway since graduating from university — 21 days visiting seven countries. With just minutes available online each day (mostly to scan email for anything urgent) I was…

What Would Kate Middleton’s Life Be Like If She Couldn’t Conceive An Heir?

What Would Kate Middleton’s Life Be Like If She Couldn’t Conceive An Heir?

In the late 1990s Crown Princess Masako of Japan faced enormous pressure to produce an heir, such pressure that some believe it changed her life for the worse and contributed to mental illness. If you had told me 15 years ago that stories on the value of the royal womb would be playing out in the news in 2013, I’m not sure I would have believed it. I remember reading about Princess Masako (we’re the same age) long before my battle with infertility did a number on my psyche. I…

Not All Mothers Are Sanctimommies, Hooray!

Not All Mothers Are Sanctimommies, Hooray!

As part of my blogoversary week of lessons learned… #2 The Blogosphere Can Foster Strange Bedfellows One of the toughest aspects of being part of a group routinely held up for scrutiny (e.g. women without children) is facing detractors who feel perfectly at ease casting aspersions or passing value judgements on our lives. I don’t know about you, but I don’t particularly relish being put on the defensive. That’s why it was with some relief — and a smidge of amusement — that I found myself witness to, rather than…

If You Think You’ve Changed, Just Wait

If You Think You’ve Changed, Just Wait

“At every age we think we’re having the last laugh, and at every age we’re wrong.” -Daniel T. Gilbert, Harvard Psychologist How good are you at predicting who you will become? If you’re like most people you’ll underestimate how much change awaits you. This conclusion was born out in a research paper published in Science and covered in a recent New York Times piece, titled, “Why You Won’t Be the Person You Expect to Be.” Researchers measured the personalities, values, and preferences of more than 19,000 people who ranged in…

You’re In the Right Place

You’re In the Right Place

  Welcome to the refreshed Silent Sorority blog. I invite you to look around. You’ll find lots of new features that were not available on my older, original blog. After three years of writing about life after infertility it felt like a change was in order. A few things to point out. You’ll find drop down navigation above that includes a variety of posts, links and research. Within, and at the end of blog posts, you’ll find smart coding surfaces and recommends relevant, related posts from around the blog. Do…